Tag Archives: testimony

12 Years Clean

January 27, 2012 at the age of 34 was the first full day at my second Rehab. Since high school I always enjoyed getting high, alcohol and weed at first but then also the occasional dabbling in harder drugs as I entered university. It seemed the norm at that age but I usually did everything to the extreme and my competitive nature contributed to me using harder and doing dumb stuff to injure myself while high or drunk. 

After many years of enjoying getting high I thought I hit the jackpot when my doctor prescribed me OxyContin to deal with migraine headaches and back pain. I say jackpot since it took away the pain and got me high, I thought this was perfect. It was great until my tolerance kept increasing, and then after 4 years of not abusing the opiates I fell and separated some ribs and the OxyContin abuse started. I used up a month’s prescription in days and started buying them off the street. (NOT my doctors fault as for 3 years he tried most alternative therapy and non narcotic meds, but nothing worked.)

Even though I was taking so many pills daily my mind was telling me that it’s ok cause I’m taking meds that are prescribed and my doctor should really just increase my dosage so I’m not in pain or buying them illegally. In hindsight I see how ridiculous that is but at the time that was my logic. After a few years of abusing the OxyContin family noticed and I was confronted, I tried to deny and talk my way out but deep down I knew I needed help. I decided to go to rehab to get my family off my back and to learn how to “use properly” I never intended to fully quit. I was warned to abstain from all mind altering substances but I of course needed to test that theory because I thought I was smarter than all these “addicts and alcoholics”

My controlled using lasted 2 weeks and started the day I left my first rehab. 6 months later I found another rehab that offered the shortest length of stay (3 weeks) and the reason I went to that rehab was I was dying physically and mentally and needed to quit for my sanity and health. I also had learned from the previous rehab and my “controlled using” that I had to fully abstain or I would die and lose my wife and 2 boys. 

So today as I sit having coffee by the pool in the Dominican Republic I’m grateful to have my health and my family still in my life. Recovery is possible.  Call me at 1-829-932-0123 for more info or assistance.

The Magic of Always Hope

A testimonial from a previous guest:

“Roger Palsma and his family’s Always Hope center is special in too many ways to mention. Besides being in a lovely, comfortable location with a private bedroom and bath, you are made to feel ‘at home.’”

This is not what you would expect. I envisioned sterile walls, militaristic rules and pounded with the lengthy doctrines of AA.  Instead the process is laid back and loving—while keeping it very real why you are there.

Very customized and personalized; you can work as hard as you want or not at all. It’s up to you.

But the magic I think, is Roger’s unique brand of dry humor and empathy. Having clearly been a former abuser of most every recreational drug, he speaks from first-hand experience. You never feel ashamed to speak up about anything.

For those of you turned off by the dogma of AA or NA, this center has a unique way of filtering through that stuff and focusing on the useful messages within.

In short. They demystify the process of getting sober into digestible pieces.

Nothing short of brilliant.”

Call or message 1-829-932-0123 to contact Roger with Always Hope

Rebirth at Always Hope

Today, I celebrate six months without a drop of alcohol—a milestone I once thought was beyond my reach. For over 30 years, alcohol shadowed my every step, accompanying me in every celebration and every hardship. Despite my successes in business and finance, there was an ever-looming shadow: my reliance on alcohol. It reached a point where I felt I had hit rock bottom, prompting me to seek help.

While I reached out to several places, many didn’t offer the genuine support and understanding I was yearning for. Everything changed when I spoke to Roger. In him, I found someone who truly listened, understood my concerns, and most importantly, didn’t offer empty promises. I decided to embark on this journey to recovery, and upon arriving at this home, I felt embraced, as if I had found a family. It wasn’t a traditional setting but a home where you’ll feel at ease, have space, and above all, find peace.

Throughout my stay, each day marked a step towards healing, with unwavering support from the team, Kendal the consulerand earnest conversations with Roger. I’m learning to enjoy more time in the present, cherishing moments with my kids, and having better control over myself. Every day, I wake up without the regret of the day before. Is it easy? Not always. I miss the times of “fun” and parties. However, now I can attend a party, enjoy it, and not be burdened with conflicting thoughts the next day.

If you’re struggling with this, I recommend taking action, seeking help, making a decision, and just taking that step forward. My only regret is not taking action sooner. If you’re willing to make a change, reach out to Always Hope and give yourself a chance to live again.

Thanks, Roger and your family! You always have a friend here! 

Call or Message 1-829-932-0123 today for assistance.

Addict in Denial, A Testimonial

Addict in denial is a long testimonial. I never change any words and post exactly what was given to me. Due to the length, and to protect anonymity I have deleted some words, sentences and paragraphs.

Call 1-829-932-0123 for more info

I never imagined I’d end up in any type of rehab program. Being a musician for more than half of my life, I’ve always been surrounded and tempted by every drug imaginable and endless free drinks. What I was not aware of was all of the childhood trauma and PTSD , that was also part of who I was. I came to the Dominican Republic for the first time with my fiancé on April 20th for our engagement trip, and she left me there because I had gotten a middle ear infection from swimming in the ocean and the doctors told me I could not fly for 5 to 7 days. After she flew home, things in my life went horribly south.


Not only was there previous problems in my relationship with my fiancé and family back in the states, but a lifetime of fighting my own demons internally. So after a couple days of severe, “fear and loathing” in the Dominican all by myself. My fiancé decided that she needed to find a rehab program that I would actually participate in. Which brings me to Always Hope.


I had already agreed to her and my family that maybe I needed to get some help or therapy and come to terms with my addiction which I was in complete denial of. So she said she found this place and that it was completely paid for if I go for the entire month. After getting into a bar fight at the dance club I got in a cab and 7 1/2 hours later, I arrived in Sosúa. Knowing nothing about Always Hope or who these people were much less the therapist that I was going to be assigned to… I went.

I arrived on May 1 in the middle of a rainstorm, about seven or 8 o’clock in the evening. Not only was the staff, polite and welcoming. I merely felt the sense of being in someone’s home, not in any type of medical facility.
After an arduous, seven hour grueling ride through the mountains and winding roads, I was so exhausted that I made some food and went directly to my own private room, turn on the air-conditioning and lay down for the night.

The next morning I woke to Roger smoking cigarette, drinking coffee on the back patio by the pool. He handed me a binder with some paper and a pen, and that started my journey. Just like any addict in denial I thought there was no way I was gonna make it a week much less a month here and I immediately contacted my fiancé to tell her she needed to get me a plane ticket and get me the hell out of here. Not because Roger, his wife or son we’re in anyway mean or rude. It was because I just felt so out of place.


How could I be here? 45 years old just got engaged and here I am checking into a rehab program for a month. Roger handed me the AA 12 step book as well as the NA book. And I remember him saying you’ll get out of this what you put into it. And he gave me his backstory of 11 years of sobriety from much harsher drugs and much worse scenarios that I had ever imagined. I think that was the catalyst that changed my mind and heart about this program.

Over the course of the next few days upon meeting my therapist, Kendall and really immersing myself 110% with all of the literature, worksheets, and both AA and NA meetings, I began to feel the healing and the legitimacy of this program of recovery. And even though I was at most times, very stubborn and apprehensive to do any of the worksheets, I always told Roger my answer is “YES”.

What I got from going to three AA meetings and one NA meeting a week was beyond what I could ever have hoped for. The “community” as they call it of people from all over the world and backgrounds became my new group of friends and family almost immediately. Their stories of trials and tribulations and battles of their own addiction of all kinds, truly inspired and motivated me to stay the course.

I was not supposed to leave the premises unless with Roger to go to the beach, grocery store, dinner or meetings. At times, I felt trapped because I would continuously ask after my one hour therapy session every morning from 9 to 10, to go to the beach or see the town. Roger would say let’s talk about it tomorrow. What I didn’t realize until my third week was that he had done this program with so many different clients over the years, and he had learned from his mistakes and the mistakes of those that did not abide by the program and the 12 steps. So I always knew he had my best intentions at heart, and he was only difficult because he actually cared about me.

What I got from that was a lifetime of tools that I could apply for not only myself, but any individual I come across for the rest of my life who is suffering from an addiction. I am truly grateful for those that got me here for the friends that supported me through it and for the entire community here in Sosua, especially Roger, Shauna, and Pierce for welcoming me into their home and trusting me.

I’ve never left a review of any type on any social media or Internet platform until now. And I only did this, because I believe if there’s someone out there or someone that you know that could benefit from reading this testimonial, and it could inspire them to even go to an AA meeting or seek help, then I believe it was worth every single moment, and word I wrote. If I was able to give Always Hope six stars, I would do that because Roger and his team down here and community truly know how to help individuals just like themselves overcome even the deepest, darkest demons.

Call or message 1-829-932-0123 for info or assistance

Ego and Pride (Testimonial)

I ask all guests if they would submit a review or testimonial to help others have a better understanding of what it’s like at Always Hope. I enjoy when they give me it before leaving but I love it more when it comes months or years after they have left. I find it means they are still doing good and that we are still in weekly contact. Below is a testimonial I just received from a guest that was with us within the last year. I copy and paste and don’t change or fix grammar or spelling

“I would like to add a testimonial, to help those of you who are looking for help restoring balance to your life.

As an older professional, I felt trapped by discreetness. My pride or ego could not handle other people potentially knowing. I kept trying to deal with my addictions by myself, and I kept failing. My wife helped me find this program which is different from an institutional program. I was ready for a change. I didn’t know what to expect, but this program was perfect for me. I realized that the journey to be able to reflect on my disease or behaviour is personal. The opportunity that is created by Always Hope was safe caring and supportive of all the challenges that I faced. It truly can only come from people that have faced the same challenges.

For those of you that know the institutional road is not for you. Please consider this opportunity. Saying that you must be ready to change. Only you can make that decision, this program is too help give you the tools and resources for success.”

If you or a loved one is looking for a place to heal and recover from your addiction call or message Always Hope anytime. Don’t let your pride or ego stand in the way of getting the help you want or need.

1-829-932-0123

3 Signs You Have An Addiction Issue

When I was using there were many signs of to myself and loved ones that I was out of control and life was becoming unmanageable. For the most part I thought I was using my “meds” cause I needed them to survive, although I loved the high it gave me and helped manage my pain. Until I got sick and tired of being a slave to my OxyContin I assumed I would just be on them for the rest of my life. I didn’t believe I could go without them even though I knew that taking 5-10 times the dose my doctor prescribed was a red flag. I’m glad my family and doctor finally noticed and were brave enough to confront me about my addiction. I was of course pissed off initially at then and everything but deep down I needed help and glad they noticed the signs.

Below are just 3 common signs of addiction.

Using is Causing Work or Relationship Problems

While I was using I was so preoccupied with figuring out how when to get more and how to hide my problem. This made me emotionally, mentally and physically unavailable for family and friends. It also was starting to impact the quality of my work. Although the bills were always paid, the work was completed and I was physically around for my family I wasn’t 100% there.

I have met many highly successful and “functional” addicts and alcoholics. Everyone has a different bottom or turning point where they decide enough is enough. Not every person needs to lose their job, house and family before they decide that they have a substance abuse problem. It’s progressive and sometimes slowly gets worse unless actions are taken. Therapy, 12 step meetings, rehab are all options to help before ending up in jails, institutions or death. Help is available in many forms.

We can help by either chatting on the phone or pointing you in the right direction to receive the assistance that you want or like.

Call or message me at 1-829-932-0123 to talk with me today.

Trying to “Control or Manage” Consumption

It isn’t always about how much or how often you drink or use but more likely that you find you can’t live without it. Binge drinkers or weekend warriors often assume because they don’t consume on a daily basis that it’s not a problem. But if they had to picture going without their substance of choice for a month or more they would be resistant.

Many like myself felt we could control or limit or using. For an addict or alcoholic this is just an excuse or we are fooling ourselves. Many people have mentioned (and me also) that many days, weeks and months went by where every night I thought that tomorrow I won’t use. That rarely or never happened once the craving and obsession entered the mind.

Until I came to the conclusion that one is too many and a thousand is never enough I didn’t and couldn’t recover. For me and many abstinence was the only way.

Health is Affected

Lastly I personally could tell my health was being adversely affected and I know family noticed it as well. I was extremely under weight and ill often, also every scrape or cut seemed to get infected as my immune system was compromised by my using.

Many people I’ve met through Always Hope and my stints in rehab felt their health was failing. Some noticed the signs on their own and others were made aware by their doctors. Some of the health issues like failing liver or memory loss were so extreme that hospitalization was likely the next step.

Thankfully the body can often heal the damage before it’s permanent by abstaining from the abused substances. I just hope anyone suffering through the grips of active addiction seek help before it’s too late.

Paradise found: a rehab like no other (testimonial)

Paradise found: I came to Always Hope at a low point in my life.  Five days into my two week stay at my house in Cabarete, having escaped the northeast winter as I do every year, I was still living a life which revolved around anticipating, using and recovering from a daily intake of alcohol, much as I had done for the past 25 years or so in the states.  I was in the throes of my addiction,  my life closing in around alcohol, and wanting to stop all the time.  I thought about going to AA, going into rehab, etc., but I did not, could not take the first step.  It was the stage 4 cancer diagnosis I received at the end of 2021 which was my “rock bottom” in which I realized I may very well die, but I will definitely die, sooner rather than later, if I don’t stop NOW!  But here I was in the DR, still doing the same old thing.

 Finally,  one late night I googled “rehab in Cabarete” and came upon “Always Hope”.  I immediately called the next day and was answered by a human ,  Roger, the owner.   He answered my questions about his program, in a measured , soft spoken manner, and did not say too much, though I noted a calm voice, which I found reassuring.  I detected a heart.  Though there was no hard sell here, almost a benign indifference.  “Take it or leave it” he seemed to say.   He told me about local AA meetings which he offered to meet me at.  But I knew I probably wouldn’t get there on my own, and I needed help to get away from the alcohol. So without any real hesitation or investigation, and with no real options (there was no Dr. Bob to lock me in a room), I requested that he take me in.  He came the next day to pick me up.


The location is a well appointed, modest sized villa with a large terraced pool in a luxury gated community between Sosua and Cabarete.  I was immediately greeted by his friendly wife  Shauna and their son,  then shown to my private  room and bath in a separate area overlooking the pool terrace.  I quickly felt at home.  I soon realized I was the only “visitor”, something which at first made me a little nervous, but which I soon came to relish.    It was my first day of sobriety in 25 years and had no idea how it would go.  But I was in a low-key, quiet, relaxing place away from alcohol.  Even there are no locks on the door, I knew I was safe.  And off to my first meeting later that day.  Once I made that first break, I never looked back.

  
 The program at “Always Hope” is deceptively simple, almost minimalist in style.  The structure being daily 1 hour counseling sessions, two or three weekly AA meetings “off-campus, and study guides and literature provided by Roger to take yourself through a kind of self-guided 12 step program.   At first I felt like I needed more help and structure.  Being the only patron (the max is 3), I didn’t have any people to share experiences with and I worried a wouldn’t benefit from the interaction with other addicts in and out of various groups, as you would in a typical rehab.  But I soon realized the peace and introspection that came without having to deal with other people’s baggage, and the ability to really focus on my recovery, in such a pleasant, peaceful space.     ( I also soon realized that I would get plenty of feedback, sharing, and meeting other “people like me” in the AA meetings.).

Roger and his wife are always there, but almost in the background, present and available to talk to when needed, but otherwise pleasantly and “quietly” going about their lives.  Roger is quick to point out that he is not a counselor, but he was a good sounding board and shared his own experiences with addiction and recovery when appropriate.  I soon realized that Roger’s function for me was like that of a host, or tour guide;  helping me navigate through the process of my own new found sobriety in a congenial, unobtrusive, and relaxed  manner.  Going to my first AA  meetings with him was major a life changing experience.  Having avoided and been afraid to go for so many years, I needed that personal escort.  Once there, I quickly embraced and became emerged the AA program.  A life long skeptic and atheist, I  soon realized that AA would be essential to my long-term sobriety.    

Daily  runs and casual chats with Shauna, and movie night, focused on addiction movies, were some recreational highlights.   The unrestricted use of my phone and IPad was also much appreciated, as I did not want to place my life on hold.  In fact, for me, one of the chief therapeutic aspects of the program was the ability  to experience elements of my life and some of the daily stressors sober, within the confines of a safe place.  A kind of “exposure” therapy.    Shopping trips with the host, which entailed walking past the liquor aisles, also served in this regard, as well preparing my own meals, which I had normally done drunk.   Though food is provided and there is easy access to the kitchen, Shauna is happy to prepare meals upon request. This is not the place for 4 star resort service, however, and you are expected to basically clean up after yourself, do your own laundry, etc., which is all part of the process.   

Though most of my time was spent at the Villa, customized outings were arranged.    I was able to visit my house several times and tend to my chores, chickens and dog, without alcohol being part of the picture.  That was hugely therapeutic.  The most important thing was to be able to stop drinking, and begin my AA experience, and I could not have done it without  “Always Hope “.  I will forever be grateful.

Change the Way You Look at Things

Change is possible, and even though this guests first language isn’t English I didn’t change what he wrote and only fixed some spelling to make it more readable. So happy to have had a guest so willing to accept the process and embrace recovery, this is his testimony or testimonial.

“I found Always Hope when I was searching on the internet for a rehab nearby in the Caribbean because I needed to change and really needed a break to get out of everything because the liquor had taken complete control of me. I really didn’t have it under control anymore, and finally gave in to myself that I had a problem and I was an alcoholic. After hearing it from loved ones a couple of times that I drink too much and too often. It also got to me that I couldn’t lie anymore to the people that i loved and i couldn’t do that any more, because it was hurting me, brought me shame and made me very sad. But I also realized I was hurting my loved ones a lot, and I knew that if I continued drinking like that I would lose their trust in me, and making it difficult for them to love me and support me. If I continued and didn’t change like I was sure I was going to lose them and that I would end up in the gutter. 

So then I took my first step towards recovery, I gave in to the fact that I had a bad drinking problem and that I needed to change my life. I called Always Hope 1-829-932-0123 and they had a bed available. So I packed my suitcase and jumped on an airplane to the Dominican Republic and Always Hope. When I finally arrived there I received a warm welcome. In the beginning I still felt a bit emotional but being together with a happy family made me feel a lot better and the help from everyone around me was really good. Also the beautiful green nature around the property made me feel really good.

change is possible
Change and growth is possible

Very quickly after my arrival I didn’t miss the alcohol anymore, and every day I felt a better, bit by bit. Also the AA meetings which Roger took me helped me greatly, I felt and saw that there was people like me with the same troubles and struggles in their lives. At these meetings I could empty my heart without feeling ashamed of myself, because they understood. The counselor at Always Hope was also really great, in the beginning it was hard and emotional but the further I got in the program the better it got and the tears changed to smiles and joy.

At this moment the month at Always Hope has passed and I am ready to go back to my normal world, back to my loved ones and to my work. I have received a lot more knowledge than when I left home and with a very positive and happy future in front of me without the alcohol. I really recommend every alcoholic or addict to go to Always Hope so they can also find, just like me, the happiness and positive feeling in life. And always remember that you are never alone and that there is always hope

Recovery, My Loved Ones Perspective

In  the past seven plus years since Roger has been in recovery from his addiction to pain medication, I (his wife) have noticed such a positive change in his overall character and personality. This is my testimony or testimonial into how life has changed and this program works.

Call or message 1-829-932-0123 today to speak with Roger or I.

First of all, especially in the five years and since we have moved to the Dominican, he portrays a scene of calmness about him. Very laid back and so easy to talk too. Even participants who spend their time with us, will sit and talk with him about anything and since he can relate they seem to be comfortable around him.

He has a certain peace about himself, a quiet content spirit that is very welcoming. Almost like he has reorganized on the inside.

Another big change in our family life is that Roger is more available as a husband and a Father. Emotionally and physically he gives more of himself. Emotionally his patience has returned, willing to listen and communicate with us.

Physically he works out with our son and I, also playing basketball and street hockey with local friends as well as our boys. And doesn’t hesitate to help around the house a lot more to make my job easier. Our lifestyle change as well as his recovery has played a big part in that. 

recovery
recovery

The ambition I see in him is unbelievable, My husband got his spark back, everyday we grow closer as a couple as well as a family. Our relationship is the strongest it has ever been. The trust between us took years to replenish but I now I give him a huge amount of respect for what he has given us as a family, after coming back from the ultimate rock bottom.

They say the strongest men come from the darkest places and I believe to be true, that if you can turn your life around and rise, after being at the bottom you can conquer anything.

Testimony: “I’m glad I didn’t go anywhere else!”

“I’m glad I didn’t go anywhere else!”

I came to Always Hope not knowing what to expect. At home some people I knew had worked with Jim (counselor) and knew Roger and Shauna (owners) and had the utmost praise for them. Now, after being here for a month I feel the same way, and this is my testimony or testimonial.

Jim is an amazing counselor with the knowledge and experience with alcoholism that I was looking for. I really could relate to him. His approach to working the 12 steps helped me to fully understand and incorporate them into my life. I look forward to our new found friendship an will be a little more at ease in my recovery knowing he is a phone call or text away.

Call Always Hope 1-829-932-0123 for more info

I can’t say enough about the generosity given by Roger and Shauna. To welcome me in to their lives was truly a blessing. I felt like part of the family and their 2 sons were always guaranteed to make me smile or laugh. Their story also helped me trust where I was because they too know the plight of an addict/alcoholic.

The facility is beautiful and is located in a safe gated community. I had a private room and if I felt I needed to be alone I knew I could. My anxieties about location and safety were quashed the moment I set foot here.

Always Hope made sure I wasn’t cooped up and constantly stuck with my thoughts. We all need an escape on occasion and especially when you are required to look at your horrible drunk self through a magnifying glass. We went to multiple beaches, visited a farm, walked every day and even went to the top of Mt. Isabelle de Torres. The outings were one of the highlights for me and helped me immensely with my recovery. They were a great opportunity for me to sit back and reflect on what was really at work here which was me getting healthy and sane.

The food was fantastic and I even gained some weight (I was very underweight when I arrived). And about once a week we were lucky enough to eat out and enjoy some local cuisine. Make sure you try all the different fresh fruits.

I came here anxious, tired and hopeless. My life had become so unmanageable that my only options were death or sobriety. I made the choice for sobriety because I knew I had so much to live for and wasn’t ready to continue my slow agonizing suicide. I had been drinking every day for at least 10 years or 3600 days and now I feel the best I have in almost a third of my life.

My experience has been fantastic. The 12 steps have really made me open my eyes to understand who I am and what is needed to recover and stay in recovery. I have learned a new level of respect for myself and others and I have learned a most gracious lesson in humility.

My higher power whom I call God is now someone I turn to every day for guidance. I had abandoned Him for so long but I knew he never abandoned me. Spirituality and surrendering to your higher power, whoever are whatever that may be, is in my opinion the foundation of the 12 step program.

I will be forever grateful to Jim, Roger, Shauna and their boys for helping me on my journey of sobriety. My disease is not curable but they have given me hope knowing that the tools supplied to me at Always Hope will make my disease of alcoholism manageable. I love the mantra “One day at a time” and will live my life accordingly.

Thank you Always Hope and anyone seeking a new better sober life please consider Always Hope. It changed my life and I’m glad I didn’t go anywhere else!

Sincerely a recovering alcoholic.